A Growing Army

Hello,

I have often wondered why my family is the way they are. They are not like a regular family. They treat each other like dirt, gossip and spread rumors.
Sorry, but we are not in High school anymore guys! There is this thing called family and a real family is supposed to support you through everything not look down on you but help you through life.
In regards to my family, I am lucky if no one talks to me at parties. That is how bad it is.
Lots of my family members didn’t have a good childhood and you would think they would want more for their children and grandchildren but they don’t.
My parents are the complete opposite of my other family members. They are what you call “good people” They want you to relax and be what you want to be and they don’t judge.

Thanksgiving is going to be interesting this year. I can’t wait! I also have a short poem to describe my confidence, passion and fire.

Rain

A sight in the sky

As I make my way through the storm

I climb up the ever glorious Smokey Mountains

Rain pours down on me, to cool me off from this ever long journey

A Fork In The Road

Hey,

My cousin, Shannon has demons brought on by a tragic childhood. To see one of your family members die at a young age is horrible and then you ask the million dollar question why?
Still to this day Shannon will not go to church or smile a true simile because she believes she is punishing someone.
In conclusion to her mindset and mentality she makes everyone else who confides in her about things crumble until your cold as ice inside.  At first when I confided in Shannon I thought it was cousinly love because she was really helpful and caring but one day she just burst out into a fit of anger telling me that I am nothing but a charity case. I am willing to share this piece of information with you guys. This is the message she sent me one day:    “I have been looking after you because you've needed it and have been so socially awkward around the family that someone had to defray it.”   One of my family members said this to me and they don’t even care to get to know me that is how pathetic this situation was.
My family used me to get information from me but this is how I fought back:
An Optimistic Future
I never truly knew what my future would hold,
Until one day I knew I was going somewhere.
It took a lot of hard work and dedication,
I had haters along the way and still to this day,
They can hate all they want but my mind will never change.
I paved my way to success and that is all that matters.
I want to be a helping hand to the environment,
Dance in all its glory and celebrate its wealth.
Explore the peace and quiet that is my sanctuary,
It’s such serenity, a blissful thing.
If only everyone could see its beauty like I do! Working with nature is my future and my beginning.
I have to say though; it is an adventurous calling,
I have to remember those who inspired this dream.
I wish these warm hearted people all the best,
It takes a true individual to do what they do best!
I have seen the darkness but there is always light,
Light a waits at the end of this journey to my beautiful beginning.
I turned to poetry and I wrote a narrative but what really helped me become a confident young women was inspirational quotes from Brainy Quotes.com
If you ever need some inspiration when you think all is lost and there is something holding you back I suggest you click this link:
Brainy Quotes

Finding Shelter

Hello,

I don’t know if any of you felt like this before but a month into my sophomore year I started to get anxiety attacks and it made me feel weak, vulnerable and useless. I had a lot going on, over the summer I had my Uncle Jim die unexpectedly and my grandfather was in the hospital sick with aspirating pneumonia.



I shall stay calm in moments of stress... by Live Life Happy licensed by CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

It was a terrible summer but I told myself before school started that I would get through sophomore year and come out with a bang.  I never felt like myself again because everything started closing in around me but then I found a refuge, someone to talk to and that was Christina.  
 She just listened to me while I talked and didn’t say anything unless I asked her something. It was a good therapy session at lunch then to get my mind off things she would recommend one of her books that she was reading and we would have weakly discussions about that. It never got old and still to this day a great thing to get my mind off things.

I tried confiding into my cousin about everything that happened instead of unloading everything on Christina but what happened is unexplainable….. TO BE CONTINUED......wait! There is one more thing I want to leave you guys with. A Haiku!

The dirt, protects me

The world is dark and big

I am sheltered

A New Beginning

Hello,

Last week I had said that I would talk about my best friend this week and share a poem that I wrote for her, to help explain how much she means to me. I am, but first I would like to share just a little two minute clip of what are friendship is like, so you get a deeper feel for our friendship.

I hope what you got from that was very real and relatable to what your friendship with your friend or best friend is like. I know it's very relatable to mine.
Christina came to me when I needed a friend the most because without her, I would probably be going to therapy one day a week! She will always be my light. With her, I had a chance at a new beginning, a new start to a new and fresh friendship. With that though, I needed to know how to trust again and take down my walls. It wasn't easy but Christina had patience of a saint.
I would like to thank her now for being my rock and giving me the most wonderful friendship in all my friendship experiences.
Here is to you Christina for being my light through all my darkness:
New beginnings are reviving
Like spring or a spring flower
After the cold, harsh depths of winter,
But isn’t it great to have someone with you,
When you come out of the cold and into the warmth?
Friendship is like that, because without friendship,
There is never a good chance of getting out of the cold
With someone waiting for you in the warmth
Your friendship is my heaven to keep me from the icy depths of the cold.
To be continued...
Next week: Next time I will be talking about some of the struggles I have went through with Christina during that same year my friends left me.

A Prisoner Traped and Ready To Be Set Free

Hello,
I never really liked poetry but when I was in my senior year of high school our class had to do the Poetry Book project and I have never been the same since. Mr. Harkins, our Portfolio II teacher made the project in such a way that it was fun but also very deep and vulnerable. It was like bungee jumping off a cliff for the first time and feeling the exhilaration from the jump. It was refreshing but freeing to put everything into a poem and make it creative and yours.
I just wanted to explain a little bit about my poem. This is a cinquain poem. Cinquains are five lines long. They have 2 syllables in the first line, 4 in the second, 6 in the third, 8 in the fourth line, and just 2 in the last line. Cinquains do not need to rhyme, but you can include rhymes if you want to.

As an example, my poem is describing about feeling like a prisoner but not really wanting to be a prisoner, just really wanting to be free from the evils of high school.

 Distant

But trapped in

Nevermore again free,

Forever caged in solitude

Prisoner

 I felt this way during my sophomore year of high school when all my friends left me. Back in the summer of soon to be sophomore year of high school there was a fall out with my group of friends and I. At the end of freshman year in high school, my one friend told me she was bisexual and some of my friends didn’t really like it. Soon there became a split amongst my group of friends and I was in the middle of it. I chose my bisexual friend over my other friends because I don’t think discrimination is right and if my other friends think it is than I don’t want to be friends with them.

                           Last day of 7th grade. Starting on the left Georgia,Kenzie,Rachael and Lauren

Once sophomore year came, they made it a living nightmare for me. They told false rumors to some of my friends that had nothing to do with this fight and the worst part was my friends believed them. It was just me protecting my one friend all year until I met Christina Nicholas.

To be continued. Next Monday I will write about the light that came to me when I needed it the most. I will show for the first time the poem I wrote for my saving grace. I hope you guys like it!